My perfect record

March 31, 2014 · Posted in Campaign 2014, National politics, Politics 

I just have to have fun with these sometimes.

While I think more about the state financial reporting deadlines, we’re coming up on a federal quarterly deadline tonight. (Is this year already 1/4 over? Sheesh.) So since I’m on the mailing list for both sides, I got this the other day from Jordan Kaplan, who needs 14 people in Salisbury:

Michael –

We’re coming up on the first major fundraising deadline of 2014, which means that I’m spending an unhealthy amount of time looking at spreadsheets to figure out if we’re going to be able to give Democratic candidates the resources they need to continue building their campaigns.

Now, Michael, my eyes are pretty bleary, so I wanted to check in: Is this a mistake?

YOUR ONLINE SUPPORTER RECORD (click here to update)
NAME: Michael
EMAIL: (redacted by me)
SUPPORTER ID: xxxxxxx758087
2013-2014 DONATIONS: $0

Nope, Jordan, your eyes are perfectly fine, even if your taste in employers is quite questionable. The only mistake would be if there were any number higher than zero. Although, then again: don’t I give Democrats enough? After all, they’re running this state and nation into the ground while taxing us to death, especially here in Maryland.

However, it’s not like I give the GOP a whole bunch of money either, aside from the couple hundred dollars I pay for registration to our conventions and my Lincoln Day Dinner ticket. (Both are reported to the Board of Elections.) Being a struggling writer means my checkbook generally has to stay shut, which is too bad because we have some great candidates.

Yet if you are like me, you are being bombarded with a lot of requests from federal campaigns. Obviously they’re trying to look good for their reporting even though the money would do them practically as much good donated April 1st as it would March 31st.

And I must say: Democrats are the whiniest bunch. They love to make bogeymen out of the Koch brothers despite the fact that most of the top donors are Democrats – the Koch brothers don’t even rank in the top 50. But they sound eeeeeeeevil.

So they haven’t given me any reason to break up this perfection. Almost everyone with any common sense has long since left the Democratic Party – but do you notice that when they come this way to speak, they generally try to sound like the second coming of Ronald Reagan? I look forward to those explanations in coming days.

Comments

One Response to “My perfect record”

  1. No foolin’ – really? : monoblogue on April 1st, 2014 8:45 am

    […] I pointed out yesterday, I get a lot of e-mail from candidates asking me for money. But in building his case for his […]

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